Some Tuchises Are Meant To Be Seen (and Other Life Lessons)

I’ll confess that there are moments when my life feels like an R-Rated episode of I Love Lucy.  Just such a moment occurred on New Year’s day, when I brought my MacBook into an Apple Store in a busy mall for repairs.  Everything was going smoothly until the Genius Bar guy asked me to turn it on. I turned it on, all right.

You know how when you boot up your computer various applications open depending on your settings? Trust me, they do.  And one of those applications is your photos.  And if the last photo you took is a picture of you, dressed only in your panties, contorting your body to check out the size of your butt in the mirror, it could lead to much awkwardness.

It was one of those experiences when time seems to slow down, and everything moves in slow motion. My finger descends to the start button and an image of a huge, marshmallow-like tushie fills the screen.  I react by frantically pushing every key I can find, including some on the guy next to me’s computer, while the Apple Genius Bar guy keeps repeating over and over, “Scroll down! Scroll down!” Fellow shoppers turn to face us questioningly, and then sounds of shock travel through the crowd. I slap my hand down over the offending image, in a desperate, low-tech attempt at modesty, while I start mentally calculating how much the therapy for this one is going to cost. And if I can get a group rate. As an aside, Apple Stores are crowded on New Year’s day.

The thing is, as embarrassing as that experience was, and believe me, it was embarrassing, I’m still alive, and now I’m laughing about it. Actually, I’m fairly sure that many people are laughing about it, especially the other Apple Genius Bar employees. There was a point in my life, however, when I wouldn’t have laughed. Back then, I tried very hard to be as careful and as cautious as I could be, so that I could avoid seeming uncool at all costs.  The younger me would have anticipated the possibility that I could become the Larry Flint of the Apple Store, and would have changed the damned settings.  I spent a whole lot of time worrying about how I looked, and how I acted, and what people thought of me … too much time.

The thing is, no matter how careful I was, stuff like this still happened to me.  If I had remembered to ditch that picture, I would, undoubtedly, have tucked my skirt into my pantyhose instead. You see, I am now convinced that I was put on this Earth to write romantic comedy, and all of this is just material that God is generously giving me to use, so that I can make people laugh. Frankly, I much prefer that theory to the possibility that I’m just a big dork.

My point, and I do have one, is that whatever makes you, you is special. Don’t spend your life trying to be someone else, or before you know it, life will pass you by.  Whatever your own quirks may be, just embrace them, honey.  Let your weird light shine! Some tuchises are meant to be seen. Happy New Year!

18 thoughts on “Some Tuchises Are Meant To Be Seen (and Other Life Lessons)

  1. Jan Richardd says:

    Happy New Year to you and your family – I loved this apple store story – I was laughing out loud – not at you – cause it totally sounds like something I would do – at the situation – keep on writing please – we need more romance and humour in our life!

    Cheers!
    Janice

  2. GP says:

    OMG, honey, your life does really deserve a book, or a series of books.
    I love that you can see the silver lining in it, it just shows how the strong woman you are! 😉
    And it’s true, it really is great fuel to your books, maybe that is why your Lawyers in Love series is one of the funniest I have ever read in my life ( especially Gabby’s accidents, lol).
    Happy New Year to you and yours!

    XOXO
    GP

  3. richard says:

    Fun post, thanks !

    Writing comedic novels is a noble pursuit, with such a huge percentage of TV, movie, and fiction writing “entertainment” being of the dark and violent kind [or worse, [ Littrature 🙂 ]

  4. richard says:

    Last week I went to my public library to get the new Janet Evanovich book. This is a large metropolitan county library. The librarian told me they didn’t have the new book in yet, but had ordered (70) copies, so I could get one soon.

    I went to the computer and searched for you, Ms. Silber.

    Zip. None of your books in this large public library.

    We need all the comedy novels we can get.

    • NMSilber says:

      I’m sorry that there was nothing there. I’m not all that well-known. Yet! I’m happy to to hear that there are others who love comedy as much as I do, though. I agree that the world needs more laughter. I do want to warn you, however, that my books do also have a naughty element. They are humorous, and they have a mystery subplot, but also some pretty spicy romantic scenes. I just mention it because I don’t want to shock you. 🙂

      • richard says:

        Ms Nadine, with this talk of naughtiness, mystery, and romance, I think you are enticing me to BUY one of your books, rather than cheap out via the public library system. OK, you got me, to Amazon I go.

        I write romance\crime\comedy books, and am ready to launch a vertiginous trajectory (SpaceX got nothing on me) from the realm of the unknown to that of obscurity. 🙂

        “Comedy is just a funny way of being serious.” Peter Ustinov

        R. Dorrance

        PS – Nora Ephron, rest in peace.

      • NMSilber says:

        I meant to post that comment in reply to yours – when your book goes live, please share the link with me. I love comedy and I would like to check it out. Thanks!

  5. Patty says:

    So funny – just like your books, which I just recently discovered on Audible. Since there are only the three audiobooks, I’ll be reading the rest (and listening, too – when they are available.) Thanks so much for sharing such an entertaining story in your life.

    • NMSilber says:

      Thank you! That’s very kind of you to say. Let me warn you, Legally Wed, Winning Appeal and Power of Attorney are all novella-length rather than novel-length. Legally Wed is very popular. Power of Attorney is the least popular of the three. That was the one I wrote after having been inactive for nearly a year due to illness. (I’m better now). I am planning to put out another full-length novel called Legal Issue in early May. That one will be about Adam and Lily being pregnant and Gabrielle and Braden being parents of a newborn. 🙂 I’m glad that you like my books. I love to make people laugh.

      • Patty says:

        And I love comedic relief in a story. I like mysteries, but don’t deal well with stories that are all tension. It doesn’t matter the length – especially when I find an author I like, and as long as the producers find good narrators. The narrators for the your books were good so I’ll look for the audio novellas as well as your new book in May (with or without audio).

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